


The Ghost of You

by bellepoque



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:29:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23613055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bellepoque/pseuds/bellepoque
Summary: It has been two years, and Momo feels like life has no meaning anymore.Until one day, a miracle happens.
Relationships: Hirai Momo/Minatozaki Sana
Comments: 15
Kudos: 104





	The Ghost of You

_Oh, to see you smile for me again one more time._

Momo turns off her laptop and puts it inside her bag. She gathers all her belongings, getting ready to go home.

She bumps into Dahyun in the elevator. “Hey, Momo! Going home early today?” Dahyun asks, struggling to hold all the documents on her hand. Momo offers to help but Dahyun rejects her kindly.

“Yeah. The boss gave me permission to continue my work at home. I promised Sana I’d see her today, after all.” Momo says cheerily. She can’t control the excitement of seeing her wife’s face after long hours of work.

Dahyun gives her a small smile. “That’s good for you. I wish I can join you today.”

Momo pats her shoulder. “Don’t worry about it, I know you’re so busy these days. Besides, didn’t you visit her two days ago? I bet she was really happy.” The elevator door opens and Momo gets off. “See you, Dahyun. I’ll make sure to send her your regards.”

“Okay. And Momo? Please take care of yourself too.” Dahyun’s eyes are so warm. She has always been so caring for Momo and Sana, and they love her for that.

Momo smiles. “Thanks, Dahyun. I will.”

.

Momo sighs when she arrived at the hospital. She’s already used to the smell, but still, she doesn’t like it no matter how many times she comes here. She is really impressed by Mina who works here every day, saving people’s lives. Momo can’t even imagine how it feels, how hard it would be to be in Mina’s position.

She meets the girl in the hallway, talking to a nurse. She turns and sees Momo, who gives her a small wave. Mina whispers something to the nurse and the nurse leaves.

“Hello there, doctor. Having a rough time today as well?” Momo smirks. Mina lets out a small chuckle.

“You can say that.” She looks over to a bouquet of flowers on Momo’s hand. “I see you’re going to give Sana flowers again today.”

Momo shows her the bouquet of red roses proudly. “Only the most beautiful ones for my beloved.” Mina smiles seeing her friend. But then the smile falters when she sees dark circles under Momo’s eyes. She rubs Momo’s eyes softly, and Momo leans in to the touch.

“You didn’t get enough sleep, did you?” Mina asks, but Momo doesn’t reply. “Momo, I’m begging you please take care of yourself too. Sana would hate it if you get sick.”

Momo holds Mina’s hand when she pulls away. “I’m okay, Mi-tan, I promise. It’s just that work kept me busy yesterday, but I’m okay. I even had lunch earlier.” Momo gives her reassuring smile and Mina can’t help but to give in. She knows Momo will just give her the same answer if she keeps pushing it.

“If you say so. Then, I guess I will head over there. Tell Sana I said hi.” Mina squeezes Momo’s shoulder gently. “Oh yeah, Nayeon and Jihyo came over earlier. I don’t know if they’re still there or not.”

Momo’s chest warms up hearing their friends’ names. They still try to find the time to visit her, even though it has been almost two years. After all, they also love Sana so much. Momo smiles at Mina and thanks her before Mina walks away.

.

When Momo enters the room, Nayeon and Jihyo are already standing up and getting ready to leave. They turn around and smile at Momo, but Momo can see tears in the corner of Jihyo’s eyes.

“Thanks for coming.” Momo says as she hugs both of her friends. Jihyo and Nayeon return her hug, Nayeon even kisses her cheek.

When they all pull away, Jihyo frowns seeing Momo’s face up close. “You’ve gotten thinner. Are you okay?” She asks worriedly. Momo can’t help but let out a giggle. Everyone has been asking her the same thing.

“I’m okay! What’s with you guys? You keep asking me that every time.” Momo expects them to laugh along, but they just give her a bitter smile.

Nayeon opens her mouth after a while. “Because, I heard that you passed out at least twice a month from exhaustion. And you expect us not to worry?” Nayeon’s voice cracks at the last sentence and it breaks Momo’s heart. Jihyo squeezes her arm, trying to calm her.

“Sorry for that. But I promise that won’t happen again, okay? You don’t have to worry about me.” Momo caresses Nayeon’s cheek and Nayeon bites her lips to hold down her tears. Then, Nayeon wraps her arms around Momo’s neck, stronger this time.

“Be strong, okay? We will always be with you.” Nayeon softly whispers in Momo’s ears. Jihyo smiles warmly behind her. Momo closes her eyes, holding Nayeon in her arms.

“Thank you, really.” Momo whispers back. Nayeon lets go and both her and Jihyo say goodbye to Momo. Jihyo holds her hand one more time before leaving the room.

It’s silent now, with only Momo and Sana in the room.

Momo sits on the chair next to the bed. She reaches out to hold Sana’s hand and kisses it softly.

“Hey.” Momo greets her softly. Sana doesn’t say anything in return, of course. She can’t hear Momo. She doesn’t even know Momo is here.

“I brought you roses. They’re beautiful, but not as beautiful as you.” Momo cringes at her own words. She knows Sana would react the same if she heard that. “Nayeon and Jihyo came earlier, you know? They missed you so much. Also, Dahyun and Mina said hi. They also miss you.”

Momo looks at her wife’s face. Her eyes are closed, and a mask is covering half of her face. Momo bites the inside of her mouth.

“I miss you too. So much. I wish I can stay here with you, but too bad they won’t allow me.” She tightens her hold on Sana’s hand and tears are dropping on her cheeks. “I miss you every day. Every hour. Every minute. I can’t stop thinking about you.”

The tears are uncontrollable now. “S – sorry, I promised the other day I wouldn’t cry again but I can’t help it.” Momo’s heart hurts so much. She can’t breathe. It’s so hard to breathe. It’s so hard to breathe without Sana by her side. “It’s just – the night feels really cold without you next to me. The house is really quiet without your voice. Everything is so, _so_ different without your smile. I feel like dying.”

Momo calms herself down after a while. She wipes off the tears on her face and takes a deep breath. “But I believe you will wake up someday. I believe you will open your eyes, and I will be here when that happens. I will always be here, waiting for you.” She gets up and kisses Sana’s forehead softly. “So don’t worry, okay?”

She stares at Sana’s face again for a while. She looks so peaceful, like she’s just sleeping. But the monitors and strewn cables beside the bed clench Momo’s heart.

Momo kisses Sana’s forehead again for the last time before leaving the room. “I love you.”

.

_“Are you sure you want to do it alone? You can just wait for me to come home!” Momo giggles from the other side of the line. Sana shakes her head._

_“No! Last year, it was you who cooked for the both of us. Let me do the same today! Don’t worry, I’ve watched a lot of cooking videos! You won’t be disappointed!” Sana claims confidently. It makes Momo laugh even more. Sana can clearly imagine the smile on Momo’s face._

_The sound of Momo typing can be heard from Sana’s side. “Then, let me finish my work first, okay? I’ll be home around eight. Love you.” Momo gives her an air kiss and Sana returns it. They hang up the phone._

_Today is April 13, their wedding anniversary. The happiest day of Sana’s life._

_They have planned everything for tonight. The dinner, the movie marathon, cuddling together in bed – that was all, but with how busy they usually are with work, those little things are precious. It’s not often for them to have dinner together, much less spending time together, doing nothing. That’s why Sana has been looking forward for tonight. She couldn’t even stop smiling for the whole day._

_The traffic light turns green and Sana steps on the gas. She is too deep in her thoughts about her plan for tonight that she doesn’t realize the big truck crossing towards her in a hurry. She turns her head to her right –_

_And suddenly everything becomes dark._

_Momo’s phone rings. There’s a call from Mina. Momo taps the answer button. “Mina? Sorry I’m kinda busy right now, can you call me again – “_

_“Momo, it’s Sana! She – “_

_Momo forgets how to breathe_.

.

She wakes up crying. Calming herself for a moment, Momo checks the time on her phone and finds out it’s three a.m. right now.

_‘Shit. It’s the same dream over and over.’_

She looks over to the empty spot next to her on the bed. The spot where Sana’s supposed to be. Where she’s supposed to be lying, holding Momo close in her arms and giving her soft kisses all over her face.

It’s been almost two years and Momo feels like life has no meaning anymore.

.

“Momo, have you been sleeping well lately?” Tzuyu’s voice snaps Momo out of her mind. She takes her eyes off the laptop screen and looks at the young woman in front of her. Her head feels heavy.

Momo smiles weakly. “Yes, I have. Why do you ask, Tzuyu?” Hearing Momo’s obvious lie, Tzuyu frowns.

“Because you don’t really look well. You’ve been sleeping in the office for two days now, haven’t you? You should go home and take a rest.” Tzuyu walks closer to her and caresses her hair. Momo hums at the touch.

“I don’t think I will sleep well at home.” Momo’s voice is no more than a whisper, but it’s still audible. Tzuyu stops caressing her hair. “I’ll end up having nightmares and I hate that.”

The look on Momo’s face hurts Tzuyu’s heart. “But still, you can’t just – “

“You heard her, Hirai. Go home now.” A man enters the room. Both Tzuyu and Momo bow their heads to their head of department. He nods and smiles in return. “Actually, you’ve worked too hard these days. You need to rest. Just go home for now, and come back in 3 days.”

Momo shakes her head. “But sir, I’m fine. I just need – “ but the man cuts her off.

“This is an order, Hirai. Go home now and take a rest. Don’t worry about anything.” He says firmly. Having no chance to argue back, Momo nods weakly. Her senior smiles and excuses himself. Tzuyu bows her head until he leaves the room.

Tzuyu pats Momo’s shoulder. “It’s the order from the boss himself, Momo. Do as he says.” She warmly smiles at the older and Momo knows she doesn’t have any choice.

“Fine, fine. I’ll go home now. What about you, Tzu? Want me to drive you home?” Momo asks as she puts on her coat.

Tzuyu waves her hand. “It’s okay, Momo. Elkie will pick me up.” Then, the phone in her pocket starts ringing. “Speaking of which, it’s her. I bet she’s already here.” Momo notices the way Tzuyu’s eyes sparkle.

Momo smirks. “Of course your girlfriend will pick you up. Well then, enjoy your romantic night with your dear Elkie.” She laughs when she sees Tzuyu’s face heating up. The younger leaves the room, with her red face, saying they’re not dating yet. Momo laughs even louder, wishing her luck.

She smiles gently at Tzuyu’s back. It’s nice to have someone you love by your side.

.

Momo remembers every time she came home, Sana would always be at the front door, waiting for her. And when she unlocked the door and opened it, she was immediately attacked by Sana’s hug and kisses. She just entered the house but Sana wouldn’t let her go, and it always ended up with Momo carrying her to their bed.

Now, she is met with silence when she enters the house.

Momo smiles bitterly to herself. Two years, but she can’t get used to it. She can’t get used to the loneliness, the lack of Sana’s presence in their home. Though she can’t even call it home anymore. Not without Sana.

She puts down her things on the floor and walks towards the kitchen. She opens the fridge and takes a can of beer, drinking it on the spot. She finishes it in one gulp and throws the can on the bin. She doesn’t feel like eating. She just wants to go to her room and let sleep take over her consciousness.

She’s about to walk towards her room, when she noticed the light on the living room is turned on. Momo furrows her eyebrows. She clearly remembers turning off all the lights before leaving the house, two days ago. There’s no way she would forget. Did someone enter the house? But she is the only person who has the key.

She walks towards the living room and sees a figure on the couch. She gulps, becoming even more alarmed. Is it a burglar? She walks closer, trying to not let out a sound until she can make out the mysterious figure lying on the couch.

Momo stops breathing for a while.

She falls on the floor, unable to stand straight. Her body is shaking, her breathing becomes ragged. Her heart thumps loudly, like it wants to get out of her chest. She must be imagining things. She’s too exhausted that her mind is playing with her. That must be it. There’s no way. She must have been seeing things.

There’s no way the figure lying on the couch is her wife, who is supposed to be in a deep coma.

Trying to calm herself down, she searches for her phone and calls her friend’s number. She needs to ask Mina about Sana’s condition and where she is. It takes a few seconds before the line is finally connected.

_“Momo? Why are you calling so late?”_ Chaeyoung’s voice can be heard from the other side of the line.

Momo tries to sound composed but it seems like she fails. “C – Chaeyoung? I need to, to talk to Mina right now! Is she there?!”

_“Mina is taking a shower right now, what happened? Why do you sound so upset?”_ Momo can hear worry from Chaeyoung’s voice. But before she can answer, she hears a sound of door opening. _“Ah, she’s done. Let me put her on the line.”_ She hears footsteps and soft whispers of her two friends. She also hears a peck planted on the lips.

_“Momo? What’s wrong?”_ Mina asks.

“Mina! Sorry to bother you this late, but I need you to check on Sana right now! Can you, um, call one of your nurses to see her condition?” That sounded desperate, but she can’t help it. Her whole body is trembling and her heart can’t calm down.

Mina sounds clearly confused. _“What?! Momo, what are you – “_

“Please? I’m begging you! I need to know how she is right now!” She doesn’t mean to sound so demanding, but she needs to know Sana’s condition in the hospital right now (if she’s really there).

Hearing the despair in Momo’s voice, Mina doesn’t question any further. _“Okay, I get it. I’ll call one of my nurses to check on Sana now. I’ll call you back later.”_ Then, she hangs up the phone.

Momo bites her lip. Holding the coffee table in the living room for support, she tries to stand up and gets a closer look on her wife.

She is sleeping peacefully, like there’s nothing wrong with her. She is wearing her hospital gown like the last time Momo saw her. But she’s not wearing her oxygen mask and tubes. There’s no electrocardiograph machine, no strewn cables, no monitor. Her face is not even pale.

_It’s like she isn’t sick at all._ Momo thinks.

Momo’s phone rings and she immediately answers it. Mina has already called her nurse to check on Sana. “How is she, Mina?”

_“She’s in her room, Momo. Her condition hasn’t changed.”_ Momo can’t believe what she just heard. Then, who the hell is this person lying in front of her? _“Are you okay? Did something happen?”_

Momo decides to keep it to herself for now. It’s late, and she doesn’t want to bother Mina any further. Besides, Mina probably won’t believe her.

Momo makes up a lie. “No, nothing happened. Sorry, I just – I just had a nightmare and got worried, that’s all. I’m really sorry for disturbing you, Mina.” She can hear Mina sighs from the other line. The latter isn’t upset, but she tells Momo to take care of herself more and don’t be too hard on herself. Momo assures her she’s fine and will go back to sleep. They hang up the phone.

“Momorin, is that you?”

Momo freezes. She recognizes that voice anywhere. Did she hear it right? Was it really Sana’s voice she heard?

Momo slowly turns around to see her wife. Sana wakes up from her sleep, rubbing her eye. She looks fine. She looks _too_ healthy that Momo can’t believe her eyes.

“S – Sana? Is this really y – you?” Momo stutters. With her hand still trembling, she touches Sana’s face. And it’s real. It is Sana. She can touch her. She can feel the warmth of Sana’s face on her skin.

Tears start welling up in Momo’s eyes. She’s crying loudly, unable to hold the sound. She’s trying to say something, but is unable to do so. This feels too unreal. She can’t fully comprehend what is going on.

Sana wraps her arms around Momo and holds her close. It’s so warm, Momo cries even more. “It’s okay, Momo. I’m here.” She kisses Momo’s temple, Momo’s brow, and her cheek gently.

Momo tries to speak between her sobs. “But, h – how?!” Another sob. “I mean, you’re supposed to be – “ but she can’t continue her sentence. Instead, she swallows her words and cries again.

“Let’s go to our room first, okay? We can lie down on the bed and I’ll be with you.” Sana whispers softly before kissing Momo’s forehead. Momo nods. Sana helps her stand up, and they both walk towards their bedroom. Sana doesn’t let go of her hand.

.

Sana strokes Momo’s hair. They are lying on the bed, holding each other’s bodies. Sana plants small kisses on Momo’s head, hoping it will soothe her wife.

“Have you calmed down a little?” Sana asks in a small voice. Momo nods. She is resting her head on Sana’s chest. Sana’s heartbeat is so calming, Momo missed hearing it.

Sana starts, “To be honest, I don’t understand what’s going on either.” Momo looks up to see Sana’s beautiful brown eyes. “The last thing I knew, everything was dark. I couldn’t see anything, I couldn’t hear anything. I kept shouting for help, calling for _your_ name, but no voice could come out of my mouth. Then suddenly I woke up, and I was already here.”

Momo’s brows furrowed. “You were here all of a sudden?” Sana nods. “But, how could that be? Wait – how are you feeling right now? Are you feeling hurt somewhere? Do you feel sick?” Momo shifts on the bed and cups Sana’s cheek, her voice full of concern. Sana leans in to the touch.

She shakes her head. “No, I don’t feel anything like that. In fact, I have never felt better.” Sana smiles reassuringly, but this confuses Momo even more. Her Sana is in the hospital, unconscious. But at the same time, her Sana is here, right in front of her. Momo doesn’t understand. Is this Sana a ghost, then? But she’s not even dead yet, Mina told her earlier. Does ghosts even have heartbeats? Or, is her wife in front of her a living spirit? Is this an illusion?

What’s happening right now doesn’t make sense, but deep in Momo’s heart, she is really happy. She missed hearing Sana’s voice. She missed seeing her smile. She missed the feeling of her touch. Momo is so happy that she has never felt more alive. She doesn’t care if this Sana is a living spirit or something like that, what matters is she is here, with Momo.

Momo leans closer, until their noses touch. Sana nuzzles into her nose, giggling softly. Momo then closes the gap and kisses Sana deeply. It lasts for a while. Momo wraps her arms around Sana’s waist, pulling her even closer until there’s no space between them. Sana holds Momo’s cheeks, not wanting to let go.

When they pull away, Momo sheds another tear. She feels really, really warm. Her heart can combust with joy. “I miss you, Sa-tan.” 

Sana wipes her cheek and kisses it. Momo can see her eyes tearing up too. “I miss you too, Momorin. So much.”

.

Sunlight pierces through the curtain into Momo’s eyes and wakes her up. Momo groans, still wanting to sleep a little longer. Sana has her arms wrapped around her, making her unable to move. She already changed into her pajamas the night before. Momo stares at her wife’s sleeping face. She is ethereal. Her nose is beautifully shaped, her eyelashes are so long, and her plump lips are so adorable.

Momo traces her fingers around Sana’s face. She still can’t believe what happened yesterday. Her wife came back to her in good shape. Even though she’s still in the hospital, lying on the bed in a deep coma, she is also here. Momo thought she was dreaming, or she was hallucinating, but the fact that she woke up seeing Sana’s face proved that she was wrong. This is not a dream. This is real. This Sana is real.

The question is, how long will this last? How long will Sana be here, until the time comes for Sana to go back to the hospital – lying unconscious, unaware of Momo’s presence? 

Sana flutters her eyes open. She smiles seeing Momo and leans in for a morning kiss. Momo gives her a peck on the lips and Sana lets out a chuckle. Momo feels happiness glows inside her. 

“Good morning.” Momo says, ghosting their lips together. “Also, happy anniversary.”

Sana’s eyes widen. “It’s today?” Momo nods slightly before kissing her again. Sana smiles gently when they pull away. “Happy anniversary, Baby.”

Momo tucks strands of hair behind Sana’s ear. “What do you want to do today?” The sunlight hits Sana’s face, making her look divine, like a goddess.

Sana kisses her fingertip. “Don’t you have work today?” 

“I have a day off until tomorrow, so don’t worry about it. Is there anything you want to do? Any place you want to go to?”

Sana rubs Momo’s eyes softly, massaging the bags under Momo’s eyes. “You look unwell, Momo. You should take a rest today.”

Momo pouts. “I’m fine! Come on, let’s do something!” _Before you leave me again_. Momo wants to say but keeps it to herself. 

Sana laughs seeing her wife whining like a child. She still has the same puppy eyes like she remembered. “Can’t be helped, then. Last time, we didn’t have the chance to do anything, did we?” 

Momo’s heart immediately feels heavy hearing Sana saying that. That’s right. It was on their anniversary too that Sana got into the accident. Momo wonders why Sana could say it so casually. 

“I want to – “ Sana is stopped by the sound of the bell ringing. Momo gets up. Who would visit her in the late morning? She kisses Sana’s forehead and tells her to wait here, but Sana ends up following her. Momo sighs, smiling.

_“It’s Jeongyeon.”_ The sound from the intercom says. _“I brought you something.”_

Momo opens the door, revealing one of her closest friends, Yoo Jeongyeon. Jeongyeon is holding a paper bag with vegetables inside. She greets Momo with her usual grin. 

“Here! You made all of us worried, so I brought you all these vegetables. You have to eat a lot! Don’t just eat those junk foods from the convenience store.” Jeongyeon hands her the bag and Momo’s chest warms up. Even after all these years, Jeongyeon still takes care of her. She sometimes thinks she doesn’t deserve someone as kind and caring as Jeongyeon. 

“Thank you so much, Jeongyeon.” Sana says behind Momo. Her eyes are teary. She, too, is touched by Jeongyeon’s kindness. 

But Jeongyeon doesn’t answer her. In fact, ever since she came here, she doesn’t pay any attention to Sana. She doesn’t look in Sana’s direction even once, only focusing herself on Momo. 

It’s like she doesn’t know Sana is here. 

Seeing the look on Momo’s face, Jeongyeon taps her shoulder. “Hey, you okay?”

“Oh, sorry. I’m just uh, surprised and really touched, you know? You really don’t have to do this.” Momo smiles at Jeongyeon. “Thank you, Jeongyeon. Really.”

Jeongyeon smiles back. She ruffles Momo’s hair. “You’re welcome. We’d hate to see both of you get sick. Actually, I’m going to visit Sana today. I’ll tell her you’re going to eat well today.” Jeongyeon grins. Sana wants to cry. She missed Jeongyeon so much. She wishes she can just hug her and tell her that she will always be thankful to all of them. 

After Jeongyeon leaves, it’s silent between the two of them. Momo isn’t sure of what to say. She can’t imagine what Sana is feeling right now. 

So, it seems like everyone beside Momo can’t see Sana. How can that happen? How does this work, anyway? Is Sana really a ghost? Or is Momo too exhausted and desperate that she starts to see things that don't exist? Is this Sana a hallucination, not real? 

Momo shakes off the thought. No, this Sana is real. She can touch her, she can hold her, she can kiss her, Momo convinces herself. _She is real. She is here right now._

“So, what did you want to say earlier?” Momo breaks the silence. She wants to move on from what happened as soon as possible. 

Sana looks up at her. “Oh. Um, well I wanted to say that I want to eat hot pot with you today, but it seems like it’s impossible, isn’t it?” Sana smiles but it doesn’t reach her eyes. Momo knows Sana’s mood just dropped. If it’s true that no one can see Sana beside Momo, then everyone outside would see Momo talking to herself and think of her weirdly. Momo wouldn’t mind that, of course. She doesn’t give a damn of what people think of her, as long as Sana is by her side. But Momo knows Sana wouldn’t like that, and it probably just hurts her even more, the fact that _she doesn’t exactly exist_ right now. 

Momo tries to think of something. “Why don’t we just make it here? Jeongyeon gave us these, after all.” Momo points at the vegetables she’s holding. “We’ll buy some meat and the other ingredients later. How does that sound?”

Sana looks unsure, so Momo continues, “It’s okay, we’re just going to the convenience store nearby, there won’t be many people there during office hours.” Momo holds her hand. “I’m with you. It’s going to be okay.”

Seeing Momo’s warm eyes calm Sana’s heart. She nods. Momo kisses her cheek before going to the kitchen to put the vegetables. It’s almost 12 p.m. right now, so they decide to have a quick lunch. There’s not much in Momo’s fridge, so she stir-fries some of the vegetables and makes some miso soup. She apologises for the simple lunch, but Sana says it’s delicious and she loves it. She scolds Momo for not eating well before, and Sana’s pout makes Momo fall for her even more. 

.

Momo was right, there aren’t many people in the convenience store. But the store clerk looks at her weirdly when she is talking and laughing by herself. Momo doesn’t care, though. She is happy she can go shopping with her wife again.

They walk past a small park on the way home and Sana asks if they can stay there for a while. Momo complies. It’s a chilly afternoon today and there’s no one in the park. Sana sits on the swing and Momo sits on the one next to hers. She puts the groceries away and holds Sana’s hand.

“The first time you confessed to me was also in a park. Do you remember that?” Sana asks after a while, staring into the distance. The sudden reminiscence catches Momo by surprise.

“Of course I do. How can I forget that?” It was after their high school graduation ceremony, they stopped by a park near their houses. Sana said that she wanted to go to a university in Korea. Surprised, Momo said that she would go with her too without thinking. And when Sana asked why, Momo answered with the loudest voice she had ever let. Because she loved her and would go anywhere Sana would allow her to.

Sana giggles remembering the scene. Momo’s red face at that time was too cute. “You also proposed to me in a park, remember that too?” She turns to Momo. Her beautiful smile makes Momo forget that the sun exists.

Momo raises her eyebrows. “What?! When did I do that?” There’s no way she would tell Sana if she wanted to propose to her, that was supposed to be a big secret. It took her weeks to prepare for that. So, Sana was pretending to be surprised when Momo proposed to her years ago?

Sana laughs. “You did! But I’m not surprised you don’t remember, you were really drunk that day. We had a fight, and you went drinking with Jeongyeon and Nayeon in the evening. They called me, saying you were whining and making a mess. They said you didn’t want to go home unless I picked you up. Well, even though we were fighting, I couldn’t just ignore you. So I went to the bar and brought you home with me. On the way, you said you want to throw up. We stopped by a park nearby and you threw up. I helped you through it, and brought you water. That’s when you said it to me.”

Sana smiles at Momo lovingly, she looks at her like Momo puts the stars in the sky. “You said, _‘I’m really lucky to have you, Sana. I wish I can just marry you right now on the spot. But don’t worry, I’ll propose to you later, just wait for me.’_ ”

Momo’s face heats up. Damn, that was really lame. She can’t believe she blurted out like that. She covers herself, trying to avoid Sana’s eyes on her. “…. Sorry about that.” Momo whispers.

Sana laughs again. It is music to Momo’s ears, Momo’s favorite sound in the world. She kisses the back of Momo’s hand and puts it on her cheek. “I love that side of you, though. I love every side of you. Marrying you was the best thing that happened to me.”

Momo’s heart skips a beat. Even after all these years, Sana’s words always have an effect on her.

She holds Sana’s chin with her other hand and kisses her. Enjoying the chill air, they decide to stay there for a little while, holding each other’s hands.

.

“Noooo! You stay here, play with your phone or watch something, and wait until I’m done!” Sana insists Momo sit on the couch. “Besides, I promised last time, didn’t I? That I would be the one to cook!” It’s been a long while since Momo last saw Sana in her apron. She looks so lovely.

“Okay, okay, I’ll wait here! But don’t hurt yourself, you hear me?” Sana giggles and gives her a quick peck before going to the kitchen. Momo stares at Sana’s back. She is so happy she feels like crying again. Her whole body feels so warm, the house feels so warm with Sana here.

It’s not even ten minutes yet and Momo already hears a loud sound coming from the kitchen. Worried, Momo gets up from the couch. “Babe? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine! Don’t come here!” Sana sounds panicked. It looks like she’s cleaning the mess she just made earlier.

Momo lets out a chuckle. “Okay. Good luck there!”

.

This is the first time in 2 years that Momo had a proper dinner. The hot pot is good. Momo praises Sana for the delicious meal and her wife is overjoyed. They feed each other, wash the dishes together, and take a bath together. It’s been a while since Momo saw Sana naked, so she’s feeling something inside her body. _She missed touching her._ But Momo shakes off the thought. She has to wait at least until they’re back in their room.

They lie on the bed, watching some videos on Momo’s phone. Sana’s face is so close to Momo she can even feel her breath on her ear. Momo shivers. She pauses the video and turns to Sana. Sana tilts her head in confusion, but before she can ask what’s wrong, Momo presses her lips against Sana’s.

Sana is surprised at first but immediately melts into the kiss. Momo pulls her closer, deepening the kiss. She enters her tongue to roam inside Sana’s mouth and Sana moans. The kiss becomes a lot more intense. Momo’s hand slips inside Sana’s pajamas and starts massaging her breast. Sana gasps and Momo pulls away.

She looks at Sana with her puppy eyes, the one Sana can’t resist. “Sa-tan, can I?”

Instead of answering, Sana kisses Momo again. Momo takes this as a yes. Momo takes off Sana’s clothes and Sana takes off hers. They hold each other close, longing for the warmth their bodies offer.

.

“Momorin.”

“Hmm?”

Sana traces her fingers on Momo’s bare shoulder and kisses it gently. “Can you promise me something?”

Momo plays with Sana’s right ear. It is so beautifully shaped that Momo can’t get enough of it. “What is it?”

Sana pauses for a little while. She stares into Momo’s eyes, but Momo can’t see the meaning behind those beautiful brown eyes.

“If I don’t make it, can you promise me to take care of yourself properly and find your happiness?”

Momo wants to pretend she didn’t hear that. She wants to ignore what Sana just said. She doesn’t want to hear it. _She doesn’t like this._

Momo forces a laugh. “What do you mean, Sana? I don’t understand what you’re talking about.” Sana smiles at her bitterly. Momo doesn’t like this. She looks down, trying to avoid Sana’s gaze. “I don’t understand...”

Sana cups Momo’s cheek, though the latter still won’t look her in the eye. “I don’t want you to be like this anymore. I want you to be happy. I want you to let me go.”

“Well, my only happiness is you, Sana.” Momo raises her voice. She looks straight into Sana’s eyes now. “I don’t want to think you’re not going to make it, because I know you’re going to wake up someday. And I will wait for you. I will wait for you no matter how long it takes.”

“Momo – “

“No. Don’t. I won’t give up on you. Never. I don’t care how long, I don’t care how much more money I have to pay, I don’t care as long as I get to see you again.” Momo doesn’t realize she’s already crying. “You’re not allowed to leave me, Sana. You promised, didn’t you? You promised that you will always be with me, that you will never leave my side.” 

Sana doesn’t say anything. She just smiles, but there are tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Momo.”

“S – sorry? For what?” Momo’s voice cracks. No, she doesn’t want to have this conversation. She doesn’t like it. She hates it. “Why are you apologizing, Sana? You’re going to be okay, I promise you. When you wake up, I’m going to spoil you a lot. We’re going to have a lot of dates. I’m going to take you to a nice restaurant. I’ll even take a day off from work. That’s why, don’t worry about it, okay?”

Still, Sana keeps silent.

“Hey. Say something, will you?” Momo tries to hold her tears from coming but it’s futile, the tears are uncontrollable now. “Don’t go, Sana. Don’t leave me here. I’m hopeless without you. Stay with me forever.”

Sana wraps her arms around Momo’s neck and holds her tightly. She sniffs, and it just deepens the wound in Momo’s heart.

“I’m sorry, Momo. I’m really sorry.”

.

Momo wakes up without Sana by her side.

She doesn’t need to look for her, she knows Sana isn’t in the house. She can feel it. The house doesn’t feel warm anymore. It doesn’t feel like home anymore.

So, yesterday was just a dream, after all? Or maybe yesterday did happen, but Momo was hallucinating for a whole day. She woke up alone, she met Jeongyeon alone, she brought groceries alone, she sat on the swing alone, and had dinner alone. She talked to herself all day, imagining Sana was there, by her side.

But it felt _too real_ to be an imagination. The way Sana kissed her, the way she screamed Momo’s name – telling her she loved her for so many times, the way Sana’s body felt under her touch, the warmth Sana offered. There’s no way it wasn’t real.

At least, that’s what Momo told herself.

The image of Sana crying, apologizing over and over keeps repeating in her head. Tears start welling in her eyes again. Why did she say that? What was that supposed to mean? Did Sana tell her to just give up on her? Did Sana give up on them?

_No, I don’t want that._ Momo tells Sana, even though the latter is not here. _I don’t want to let you go._

Momo jolts when she hears the sound of her phone ringing. She reaches out to the table beside the bed and sees the name on the screen.

It’s Mina.

Her heart starts to thump loudly. If Mina’s calling her this early, it must be important. _It must be about Sana’s condition._ Momo doesn’t want to answer it. She doesn’t want to hear what Mina is going to say. She doesn’t want to. She hates it. She’s not ready. She will never be ready.

Mina calls her again because Momo ignored her the first time. Momo feels bad, but she’s too scared to answer her. It’s okay, Momo tells herself. Maybe it’s not about Sana _._ Or maybe she’ll say Sana’s condition is getting better. Momo can only hope. 

Taking a deep breath, Momo taps the answer button.

“H – hello?”

_“Momo….”_ Mina’s sobs can be heard from the other side of the line. _“It’s Sana – oh my God, I can’t –”_

Momo closes her eyes.

_“ – she woke up, Momo! Sana woke up!”_

She almost drops her phone. 

She opens her mouth to say something, but no words can’t come out. Instead, tears are pouring on her cheeks and she can’t stop it. Did Mina really say that? She didn’t mishear, right? Is it really happening? 

It seems like Mina can hear the sound of Momo crying. “ _She woke up earlier, about five minutes ago. She even asked where you are. She’s being treated right now, so you can’t see her but I thought I should let you know about it.”_ She smiles, or at least Momo can somehow see her smiling. _“I’m so happy for you, Momo. I really am. I’m glad you never gave up on her.”_

Momo sniffs. She wipes her eyes, though the tears won’t stop coming out. “I – I’m going there. I know I can’t see her right now, but – but I want to go there.” She pauses, trying to control her sobs. “Uh, t – thank you so much, Mina. Really, words aren’t enough to say how much I’m so – so grateful to you, to all of you. I – thank you.” Then she cries again. 

_“You’re welcome, Momo. We, too, are waiting for this moment for so long, just like you.”_

They hang up. Momo stays still for a while. She feels as if a heavy weight has finally been lifted off her shoulders. Her chest becomes light. Her happiness overflowed. She can breathe normally again. 

She feels like the world has regained its colors again. 

. 

Sana has her eyes closed. She can hear sounds from the other room. Sounds of whispers and giggles. She smiles. 

“Can I open my eyes now?” Sana asks loudly. The two people in the room sound panicked. 

“Wait, not yet!” Her wife answers, she sounds closer now. Sana can hear her footsteps, along with other, lighter footsteps.

Something is put on the table in front of her, and a little girl’s voice says, “You can open your eyes now, Mommy!”

Sana opens her eyes, and both her wife and daughter start to sing. 

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Sana, happy birthday to you!”

Sana laughs. Her wife and daughter are too obvious. She blows the candles, and the three of them cheer loudly.

“Are you surprised, Mommy? You didn’t expect that, did you?” Her daughter asks excitedly. 

Sana giggles. “You bet! I’m really surprised, Aika! You and Mama did a really good job!” She lifts up her daughter and puts her on her lap. She kisses her chubby cheek. 

“Yaay! We did it, Mama! Mommy didn’t expect us to surprise her!” Aika stretches her hand to give Momo a highfive. 

Momo grins widely. “You and I really make a great team!” Momo ruffles her hair and Aika giggles. 

She gets off Sana’s lap. “Let’s go to your room, Mommy! We have your present there!” Then she starts running towards the room. 

“Hey Aika, don’t run around the house!” Momo shouts out. But it’s too late, the little girl is already gone. Momo lets out a small sigh, though she is smiling. “You already knew about it, didn’t you? I mean, the surprise.” She turns to her wife. 

“She accidentally let it slip out yesterday. But I pretended not to hear it.” They both laugh. Momo caresses Sana’s cheeks and kisses her softly. Sana’s heart feels so warm at the softness. 

“Happy birthday.”

Sana presses their lips together again. A little deeper this time. “Thank you.”

“Mommy! Mama! Hurry up!” Aika shouts out from their room. They both let out a chuckle. 

“Coming!” Sana shouts back. She holds Momo’s hand, and they both walk towards their daughter. 

Momo and Sana feel at home again. 

.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you guys enjoyed it.
> 
> you can follow my twitter : soulmatesamo2


End file.
